If the person is a close friend or family member then I don't feel automatically obligated and am comfortable saying no or asking why they need the favor.
On the other hand, if an acquaintance or stranger asks for a favor, I'll feel obligated to say yes. I think it's because I'm still trying to make an impression with the person and want to come off as a decent/trustworthy guy so it's better to help them out.
Another reason is that people who I don't know very well aren't going to ask for any huge favors to begin with. So doing small favors for them isn't as hard to say yes to. Whereas friends and family will be more likely to ask for bigger favors and thus making the chance of me saying no increase.
It truly is. I don't want to be the person who lets down other people. I feel like these people either need or want my help in these matters and therefore even when I know I should take it easier and not accept all the favours or help that is asked from me I still usually accept most of them. Also out of loyalty to these people. If they are close to me I feel that I need to fulfill their expectations of me and show them that I'll do what is required of me because I care about that person. Sometimes it adds unnecessary pressure to yourself and this is while I should probably try and learn to say no more often.
How about the rest of you people?
Depends on who is asking and what is being asked.
I generally don't say no unless it is about money or takes a lot of time from my side. In most of the situations though, I generally try to do following things -
- don't keep the person waiting and tell them exactly when i will be able to do it or if not then why exactly
- if possible, connecting someone who can get that thing done
In general, no. However, I will always help when and I can, and if there's an emergency of some sort. However, my time is valuable and my network far too large to feel bad saying no. It would leave me with absolutely no free time to myself.
It depends on who asked for the favor and the amount of f*cks you give in your reputation.
I am one of those people who gives 0 f*cks on what other people think so saying No for favors that don't favor me is easy.
This is how human psychology works, we have a tendency that needs us to be liked and socially accepted (hence the name social animal).
When you are saying "No" to a favour you are rejecting him in one way or the other, which may/may not offend him. So yeah, its quite natural to deny someone for a favour.
First I consider when (immediately/later) is the favor need. Then is the person requesting the favor someone I care about. last but not least, is favor a want or a need.
With all that said if a stranger is in a emergency situation and I can help, I will.
I hate it when they ask for a favor first, without mentioning what it is. It honestly should depend on what the favor is.
It depends on the type of favor. If it is something that I can see the relevance in, I will try to help. If it is something I deem to be frivolous, and I dont't have the time, I won't have a problem saying no. Often, people will ask you because they are too lazy to do something themselves, and in that case, I will not be helping.
But in general, if I see somebody struggling with something where I think I can help them out because I know something they do not, I will offer to lend them a hand.